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Positive Boundaries

A workshop designed to be repeated consistently to ensure children are equipped with self-respect and healthy boundaries
This is an important workshop in The I AM Program as it is part of our ‘Keeping Children Safe Initiative’ which is closely aligned to the Government’s National Safe Schools Scheme and the ‘Keep Them Safe’ Program

Values developed: respect, moderation, integrity

Intelligences experienced: linguistic, intrapersonal and interpersonal

PDHPE requirements addressed: Safe Living, Decision Making, Communication, Growth and Development, Personal Health Choices, Interpersonal Relationships- Interacting.

Suggested time frame every day for one week then once a week for as long as possible

Two page handout of I AM Worth it and Positive Bubble Boundaries are available as a free download from www.theiamprogram.com

Introduction

Personal boundaries are like having an imaginary bubble around you. It means YOU decide who to let in and who to leave out. You can invite people into your bubble or you can choose to keep them out.

An effective way of understanding personal boundaries is by recognizing how the body registers feelings of YES and NO. Everyone registers YES and NO feelings differently.

A yes feeling may feel light and uplifting. A no feeling may feel heavy or uncomfortable. It isn’t always felt physically, but it is always felt.

Learning to recognise the way YES and NO feels in the body is a powerful tool to help us say no when we need to, and yes when we choose.

When children have learned to recognise feelings, they can choose their response, giving them the lifelong gift of personal power.

Feelings have a purpose!
The purpose of feelings is to guide you towards that which makes you happy and safe.

Learning to trust feelings will help children understand intuition and how it can lead them towards what is good, and away from what is potentially bad.

Day 1

• Read ‘As High As Dad’s Shoulders’(available from www,theiamprogram.com)
• Discuss how your body talks to you and what it might be saying?
• Ask questions like, ‘what would it feel like if you saw something frightening?’ followed with ‘where did you feel that in your body?’
• Ask questions like, ‘what would it feel like to have a party with all your friends? How does it feel when someone you love hugs you? What is something you like?’ followed with ‘where do you feel that in your body and what does it feel like?’

Day 2
Positive Bubble Boundaries-

Teaching children about boundaries is a powerful and positive tool.

Boundaries protect us from harm.

When you have boundaries, you choose who comes in and who stays out. When children are taught at a young age they have the right to select who touches them and who doesn’t, they are less likely to be harmed. Predators have admitted to preferring weak children who are neglected.
If you know children that have experienced neglect and you give them the gift of boundaries, you might change their life.
Boundaries begin with teaching children who owns their body. Talk about appropriate touch (example: hugs from someone you like and invite to hug you) and inappropriate touch (example: a nasty push from someone).

Talk about different scenarios and associated feelings.
For example:
How did it feel when you were pushed?
How did it feel when you patted the puppy and he wagged his tail?
What did you feel when your mummy hugged you?
How does it feel when you don’t want to hug someone?

Healthy boundaries are created naturally in homes where the parents or carers love and respect themselves.
Boundaries are usually bent or broken in homes where parents are unable to love or respect themselves. If you have children in your classroom with broken boundaries, ask the school counsellor to help you set up a care program.
Your acknowledgment of healthy boundaries in the classroom will go a long way towards mending and strengthening boundaries.

Introduce the positive bubble boundary concepts and its meaning to the children.

Day 2-5 the visualization;
Ask the children to relax into their beanbags or cushions and tell them you’re going to offer them a creative relaxation called Positive Bubbles.
Use music to help them relax and close their eyes.
Speak softly and slowly;
Begin with a relaxation …use one of your favourites or simply repeat the I AM A RAINBOW relaxation from the I AM Awesome workshop.
Whilst the children are relaxing move straight into the positive bubbles visualisation at the end.
I AM A RAINBOW Relaxation is available as a free download from the website for easy printing.

I AM A RAINBOW relaxation

Breathe in deeply, feel your breath travel down to your fingertips.
Take another deep breath; slowly let your breath travel all the way down to your toes

Let your body sink into the floor; feel your body becoming softer and lighter.
Picture all the colours of the rainbow soft and shining, filling up your mind,
feel your body becoming all the colours of the rainbow.

Softly and slowly your whole body is filling with the colour red, you feel yourself filling with energy and strength.
Red is overflowing; you are giving out energy and strength.

Your whole body is filling with the colour orange; you feel yourself filling up with happiness.
The colour orange overflows and happiness pours out of you.
You are giving out happiness

Slowly and softly you are filling with a golden yellow colour; your whole body is filled with yellow.
You are full of intelligence, it is overflowing softly warmly.
You are giving out golden yellow intelligence

You are now filling up with a beautiful green colour, soft and shiny.
You are overflowing with the yellow of harmony and friendship.
Feel yourself giving out harmony and friendship, gently, softly.

Your whole body is filling with blue colour; you are overflowing with blue.
Feel yourself giving out blue; you are filled with peace.
You are overflowing with peaceful feelings,
feel yourself giving out peace.

Feel yourself filling up with indigo colour; you are overflowing with this wonderful dark blue.
Feel yourself giving out indigo; you are now filled with gentleness and it overflows softly and gently.
Softl,y slowly feel yourself giving out gentleness.

Slowly feel yourself filling up with violet colour; you are overflowing with beautiful violet.
Feel yourself giving out violet colour.

Feel yourself gently filling up with self-respect, you are overflowing now.
Feel yourself giving out self-respect

You are the rainbow; your colours are spreading out over the sky.
Feel yourself getting bigger and bigger; your colours are going out further and further.
You feel soft and gentle and beautiful.
Your colours fill the whole room; they cover the whole country see the colours float over your house and onward, they fill up the whole world.
You spread your colours out into space.

As you softly spread your colours through the world and space,
you are also spreading peace and harmony and self-respect.

Feel yourself spreading beauty, intelligence and happiness.

Slowly all the colours spread into a stream of soft white light.
The white light is flowing through the top of your head and into your heart.
Feel all the white light go into your heart softly; you are filled with pure white light.
Breathe deeply …in …..out…

Positive Bubbles Visualisation

Now imagine a beautiful white bubble all around you. It feels wonderful to be inside your bubble.
‘Someone you love is coming towards you; it can be a parent, a friend or a pet. As they move towards you, they are stopped by your positive white bubble. They can’t come closer. It’s up to you to decide if they are allowed in. What do your feelings say? Is it a YES? Or is it a NO feeling? If it is a yes, then your loved one is allowed into your bubble. You can give permission for a hug or for them to touch you. If you choose no, then your loved one will remain outside your bubble and you can still do fun things together.’

Watching children’s reactions to this visualization will help teacher recognise children at risk. The child who squirms or is frightened may have experienced a situation that has affected his or her boundaries. The uncomfortable child probably has healthy boundaries but needs to strengthen them. The child who does this easily is in an emotionally safe place. Always check with your supervisor first if you feel there may be a problem.

Practice this visualisation every day to strengthen children’s ability to protect themselves. Vary the visualisation to include learning to say no. When a child says no, nothing can penetrate their bubble; they are always protected and safe inside it.

Expected Outcome: Children have been given the opportunity to experience themselves as emotionally powerful, in other words they will feel autonomy in relation to their emotional body. There will be a deeper personal awareness which will enable children to respond with more strength an clarity in emotional situations. Children have become aware of their individual boundaries and now have a positive outlook on maintaining them if necessary. Children have had the opportunity to get to know the value self respect.

For more information or further lesson plans or to purchase the complete I AM Program Package please go to www.theiamprogram.com or contact arnabaartz@gmail.com

Comments / Notes

 

 

 

 

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